Sunday, January 10, 2010

How I Killed An Hour Today

It went something like this:

The Mogrunt's diaper was wet, so I went upstairs to change it while talking on the phone with Becca:

1. Remove wet diaper, balancing phone between ear and shoulder

2. Put on fresh diaper, still talking but Mogrunt is suddenly hollering loud enough that I can no longer hear Becca.

3. Hang up phone before fresh diaper is fully fastened because the Mogrunt is carrying on and has already peed in the clean diaper.

4. Pull out another fresh diaper, have a look at the Mogrunt's butt and realize he could stand a little sitz bath.

5. Run tub for Mogrunt and add baking soda.

6. Undress Mogrunt and take him to the bath.

7. Let him play in the bath for 10 minutes or so - hoping that the baking soda is helping to soothe his diaper rash.

8. Take the Mogrunt out of the tub, dry him off and start dressing him.

9. Fresh diaper (see #4) is on, diaper cover is on and all of a sudden, the Mogrunt starts to make that face. You know the one. The red face. It's either poop or he's about to yell at those kids on his lawn again.

10. Help the Mogrunt to stand in his crib for a few minutes - also known as: Assuming the poopie position. He loves standing, thinks he is king of the crib.

11. The undeniable eau de toilette wafts through the air.

12. Pull out fresh diaper number 3 and change the Mogrunt. Try not to gag. Try not to say, "ooooh, stinky" as Mr. Happy likes to remind me that it's possible that I'm "shaming" the Mogrunt. Wonder if Mr. Happy's self-esteem is injured when I go on and on after he emerges from the washroom with a magazine.

13. Dress the Mogrunt and dispose of poooooooh.

14. Look at all the dirty diapers in the bucket, realize that we're almost out of clean cloth diapers. Run downstairs with the dirty ones and throw in a load of laundry.

15. Come back upstairs and rescue the Mogrunt from his crib.

16. Wonder if that isn't the faint scent of poo in the air...

7 comments:

  1. I've had days like that....

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  2. I laughed at the idea of commenting on the dirty diaper would shame a baby. I never thought of it like that before! haha

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  3. Mine always seemed rather proud when I made the "oooh stinky" face. :)
    Have you tried a little Milk of Magnesia or other OTC antacid liquid on the diaper rash? It worked wonders with my oldest daughter (who had a perpetual diaper rash and potty trained herself in one day at about 22mths when she realized that peeing in the potty didn't sting). Apply it 2-3 times per day with a cotton ball after washing the "affected region" with a warm washcloth or warm water dunk.

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  4. Oh yeah. I hear you on that one. Fun times that they never tell you about during the pre-natal classes, eh?

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  5. yah. I. Don't. Think. So.

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  6. You will look back on these days with fondness when he starts to drive.

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