I've just returned home from my great-aunt's house. My grandmother and her other sister are in town visiting for the weekend.
You know the hotline on the Butterball turkeys that you call when you haven't got a freaking clue as to how to cook a turkey? (aside - I've never called this hotline - I have an aunt I call instead). Well, visiting with these three gurus was to knitting what having Julia Childs in your house for Thanksgiving is to cooking. Screw the hotline - call in the big guns.
Intarsia? I laugh in your face. Last weekend, I read the instructions on intarsia in Stitch'n'Bitch (hereinafter referred to as the Bible) until the words all streamed together in one big confusing jumble. After about 30 minutes with these three (hereinafter referred to as the Holy Trinity) I was tossing yarn around, reading the pattern... planning the mitten I'm making for my husband like nobody's business.
I would show you the rough practice piece that the Holy Trinity and I worked on but:
1. I don't have the blog set up for photos yet
2. I don't have a digital camera*
3. We tore it out anyway - there's no way it would have fit my husband's hand - he's got giant paws!
At one point all three of them started saying something about "Easy" and "You just do it this way, blah blah blah." and then they threw around a bunch of terms that I haven't heard yet** and that's when I started to feel the room spin a bit. So I calmly placed my hands on the table, put my forehead between them and moaned "But you've got, like, 70+ years experience EACH! How will I ever catch up?" They all laughed and untangled me.
Thank goodness for grandmas. Without them, we'd all have lost fingers to frostbite caused by the use of inferior store-bought mittens. Without them, intarsia would still give me night terrors... Without them, how would we find out all the dirt on our parents and our aunties and uncles? Hey, they may be the Holy Trinity of knitting, but that's not to say that they didn't dish some good gossip over the yarn. Hee hee...
I've got to get to bed. The Holy Trinity are coming for breakfast tomorrow morning. They're expecting fresh scones and homemade jam. Anyone else want to come? Minou? Angela? Luc?
*I'm a film person. I love the unpredictability of it. It cracks me up when people stare at the back of their digi camera and say, proudly, "Oh, that one's a keeper." Of course, for the sake of the blog, I'm going to find something to use as a "Doo-fer" - I'm thinking our video camera will work... otherwise, watch for scanned "photos" of my projects. That should be interesting.
**Shock and horror - knitters of a certain age don't use all the fancy terms in the knitting books. Oh no, they use different terms for stuff... I'm scared to death to ask about a provisional cast on.
PS: Got the best package ever from Minou's mommy. Just picked it up last night. There's hand cream in it! (long, somewhat embarrassing story) and photos of Minou! YAY! Happy girl!