Monday, May 02, 2005

Feeding My Pain with Fudge

So, the icing on the cake is that JAK was finished at our office on Friday. She resigned two weeks ago. She plans to take the summer off. I haven't talked to her since yesterday, so I don't know if she is currently relishing her freedom or if she had a complete and utter spaz this morning when she woke up. Perhaps a bit of both. I know what I would do if it were my first day away from prison, er the horrible place but I'm not sure what she might do. Hmmmmm... WWJD? (What Would JAK Do?)

May I present a tongue in cheek look at what I imagine JAK may have done today to celebrate her first day of freedom:

1. Drank coffee and surveyed her farm, er, back yard.
2. CruisedYou Grow Girl for gardening tips.
3. Coveted the thought of my new cold frame and wept bitterly.
4. Knitted several rows on that sweater. Held it up after a few rows. Admired it. Measured it. Calculated how many more inches. Held it against herself and wondered if it will fit her husband and if not, will it fit her.
5. Had several miniature panic attacks.
6. Cruised online pet stores in preparation for the arrival of her new puppy. I'm guessing that she looked at Petote and tried to justify the price tag of those amazing bags. She probably cruised Minou's clothing store as well, but didn't buy anything because she's not sure of the puppy's size.
7. Cut her toenails. (The life of the unemployed must entail some personal grooming. Just because she's not in an office doesn't mean she needs to let herself go!)
8. Picked up her son after school.
9. Wrote her personal manifesto.
10. Opened her new journal and wrote these words: "Well, aren't I glad that's over. I'm finally away from SVW. Man, she's nuts. She pretended to kick me out the door on Friday. I think she actually caught my ass with her foot. Crazy woman. I can't wait to post the Bee photos. I wonder if she'll get fired????"

Hee hee... Actually, the last one is probably true. We carried on this charade on Friday when she was leaving. I walked her to the back door because her arms were full and the doors are hard to open. Some guy saw us in the hall. She had a few tears in her eyes and was carrying a box of her plants and the last few things from her office. I said, "Oh dear. That man thinks I'm escorting you out!" She laughed and said, "I bet he does!" So we hatched this plan where I pretended to kick her out at the door and she pretended to stumble a few steps with the box. I know, very, very mature. Shut up. We are too allowed to act like that.

Gosh, I'm going to miss having her around that place. 'scuze me. I think I need to go eat some fudge. It'll kill the pain, right?

Ok, is there anyone out there who still reads this "knitting blog"? Yeah, yeah, I know, there hasn't been any knitting in a while. Tell you what, if you go over to JAK's blog and tell her what an amazing person she is and how she shouldn't worry about leaving the horrible place because she's got more creativing, ambition and spunk than anyone I know (well, she's on par with Minou's Mommy)... well, if you do that, then I'll take some knitting photos and show you how that cutsey little baby sweater is coming along. I'll show you knitting porn and if you're lucky, JAK will tell you about the Bees and the Bees.

And JAK, if anything in this entry is inappropriate, well, let me know and I'll delete it...


  1. I love the kicking out part as I've heard of people really getting kicked out of their offices. So funny! Jane

  2. Ooh, whiskey sours, yummy! Just the thing to wash down that fudge with.

    I have to know, what do you do for a living that is so awful that your co-workers are fleeing for a life of leisure?

  3. aw! You guys are adorable!

    Looks like you are having a fun time too! ;)