Thursday, August 18, 2005

Cankles

So, I've been working on some socks over the last few months.

1. Kroy Crazy Stripes
I finished 1 sock. A Patons Kroy sock. In that strange green and blue colourway. I'm not happy with the sock. It's too short in the foot. I ripped it back once and added a few more rows. Then I finished it, kitchenered the toe and tried it on. Still just a smidge too short. Crap. I threw it in the drawer along with the second skein of yarn and I'm trying to pretend it's not there.

2. The Petticoat Sock from Weekend Knitting.
I started this about a year ago. Yeah, yeah, I'm not really committed to this sock. Note: I said "this" note "these". I don't know if I'll get #2 done, ever. I made a mistake in it somewhere after I turned the heel. I picked it up a few weeks ago and knit on it for a while.

But it still, pretty much, looks like this:


3. Brainylady's Basic Cabled Sock pattern
I've been not-so-secretly working on these. I don't think I've mentioned them here, but I have dragged the yarn to a couple of SnB nights. I love the simplicity of the pattern. I'm using Opal handpainted stuff - I can't find a decent photo online. Look here - it's the 2nd edition handpainted, about 2/3rds of the way down the page, the pinky purple stuff. I love how the pattern looks with this crazy yarn.
I made a booboo in these and had to rip back (I cursed the Opal sock yarn for being so tiny and splitty when you're trying to put the stitches back on the needles!)... But I also have bigger concerns. This is where the word "Cankle" comes into play.
See, I have Cankles. They aren't debilitating, but they do cause me some concern when knitting socks. I'm pretty sure that the Petticoat socks won't fit me because of this problem. Does everyone know what a Cankle is? Lemme 'splain:
Cankles \ KANK-uhls\ n: calf-ankles. i.e. A leg, or legs, on which there is no discernible line of demarcation between the calf and the ankle. Also known as "Thick ankles", "Hey lady, your panty hose are sagging" and "Poor woman". Cankle, Cankles, Cankley, Cankleliscious.
Because of my cankles, I am doomed to spend my life in un-sexy boots and long pants. Barring, of course, my participation in some extreme makeover type show where I get my CANKLES altered by plastic surgery.
There is a dreadful plastic surgery, makeover show on TV which is completely over
dramatized and infuriates me to no end, but I can't stop myself from watching the occasional episode. One night, when I was only half-watching the show, they actually used the word CANKLE when they were talking about what kind of plastic surgery this woman was going to have. I was sitting on my couch, knitting away, and I leapt to my feet when they said they were going to give the woman a Cankle-ectomy! There is HOPE!!!
Barring that, I'm going to have to learn to make socks that fit over my horrible deformity. Here's hoping that Brainylady's socks fit when I'm done!

9 comments:

  1. if it is any consolation - I have never noticed any cankliness about you.

    I, on the other hand, don't have cankles, per se...I have very large calves instead. Makes boot shopping a blast. And I'm somewhat bow-legged (thanks, great aunt arlene and great-great-aunt ruby for the genes). That means my ankles are, sigh, crooked.

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  2. No way! They have plastic surgery for that? Seems dangerous to me... Maybe it is similar to that procedure they do to make people taller? (ouch!)

    Sometimes projects just deserve to go in the drawer and not see the light of day.

    Socks are good projects for trips since they are so portable... maybe this means that you should go somewhere!

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  3. a little later (after adding a post to ye olde blog)...

    Have no fear - I've seen your cankles and raised you two crooked fingers. See that bet.

    Sorry. My competitive nature is showing, however inappropriate.

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  4. 1. I don't believe you actually have cankles. No photos, no cankles.

    2. If you actually do have them (which I don't believe that you do), the socks will still fit. It's a tube with a foot on the end! That sounds like a cankle in itself!

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  5. One sock = sock puppet.

    I'm just sayin'.

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  6. she doesn't have cankles I have seen them for myself.... It is just cause she is short her ankles are that much shorter then anyone elses - ha ha ha haaaa!!!! kidding..
    I have the opposite boot problem then most - my calves are too skinny - boots are baggy and fall down - you might think "skinny b*tch" but oh noooo my thighs are huge and totally out of proportion with the rest.

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  7. Mismatched socks, I'm sure it's the next big thing.

    Cankles? Man, what'll they think of next to tell us our bodies are not what they're supposed to be?

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  8. Your sock looks great. I envy all the knitters in the world who can knit socks, because I have yet to figure that one out!

    Have a great day!! :)

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  9. I was scrolling around google and reading about cankles when I saw your blog. I too have cankles and they totally rule how I dress and feel about myself in bathing suits and shorts. If there was a safe surgery and one that I really believe would change my lower leg, I'd be there in a nano second. Until then, I suffer with the rest of those born with the single lower appendage.

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