Sunday, September 11, 2005

Gone.

My dad called me last night. I knew what he was going to tell me, because he started out by saying, "Don't cry because you'll make me cry." So I held it together while he cried.

"Dad's gone," he said.

For the majority of my life, my father has referred to my grandfather as "Gramps" when he talks to me about his father. But last night, my father was the kid again and his dad is gone.

I don't know what it is about our relationship that does this to my dad, but he's ok until he talks to me. Then he cries. If you met him on the street or behind the corner at his pharmacy, you would never suspect that he would be the teary-eyed kind of guy. He never was when I was a kid. It was only when my mom got sick that he realized it's ok to express your emotions.

So, now I feel like I've got a million things to do. JAK came over today and dyed my hair for me, so I wouldn't be flashing the rest of the family with my white roots. I've got laundry to put away. I've got to pack to go to Parrsboro... I've got contingency plans to make at work. Andrew and I have both got to hit the mall tomorrow morning to see if we can find something to wear. (Thank goodness Winners is now nearby).

And I have a eulogy to write.

9 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry to hear about your grandfather's death. You have my condolences and my best wishes.

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  2. So sorry to hear the news. Take care of yourself, and your Dad. It sounds like he needs you and, thankfully, knows that he can rely on you.

    Love and sympathy,
    j

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  3. Oh, I'm so sorry about your grandfather! I'll be thinking of you this week. Jane

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  4. I'm so sorry about your grandfather! You are in my thoughts and prayers.

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  5. Becca7:10 PM

    Hey girl,
    I will be thinking of you this week. Travel safe. Lots of love and great big hugs.

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  6. Oh Steph... I'm late reading this post, but I add my condolences. Travel safely.

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  7. Oh, I'm late reading this as well, but my condolences and , oh, I am so sad for you. Hope you are hanging in there. Karma and good thoughts from LA to you...

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  8. From another late-comer - my condolences.

    Janey

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  9. Steph, I know how much your family means to you and how hard this is. Take care of yourself. Consider yourself hugged

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