Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Welcome Aboard Flight 107 To Gander

Newfoundland. I've said many times before that going to Newfoundland must be something like visiting England or Australia: Everyone speaks the same language as you, but their accents are so different from your own that you start to wonder if you have a firm grasp of the English language. Whenever I'm there, I start to pick up the accent (something for which I have my many Newfie roommates to thank) and people start asking me where I'm from.

On dat note, I'd like ta share sum of da stories about me trip to da RAHk.

We knew we were off to a good start when my coworker, T and I, saw this on the way to the airport.




"We've GOT to pass it! We just have to pass it!" I said to T. Under duress, T sped up and we got closer...



and then finally, we pulled out and because the camera is slow, this is all I've got:



But it gives you an idea of how big the pumpkin was. It filled the back of the truck. I'm not sure where this pumpkin was headed, but I DO know that Thanksgiving weekend is the annual Pumpkin boat race in the Annapolis Valley - and the domestic goddess herself will be there for the race this year. Yes, that's right: Martha Stewart will be racing a pumpkin boat in the Valley this year. And the Valley is where I spend my Thanksgiving holiday!!!! But, I digress...

We flew into St. John's and had a few hours between flights. T and I headed into town for supper. On the way back to the airport, the cab driver gave us directions on how to get to the outport community that we would be visiting the next day. He was from that area, so he knew what he was talking about, but poor T could barely understand a word he was saying. I think he sensed that one of us was lost, so he DEMONSTRATED the instructions:

"Ya head down da hoi-way, as if yer goin' to St. Jahn's. Take the exit at Gambo, see hows I'm puttin' on me signal loight? I'm turnin' inta Gambo. Alroight, then, the next place we comes to is Dover. But you're not goin' ta turn in there, no my ducky, no my lovely, you're goin' ta droive raght by. You sees how I'm passin' by this exit? Sees hows I'm not turnin' in? I'm droivin' raght by."

Then, he put his foot on the brake for a stop light and the brakes screeched like someone was murdering a cat in the trunk. At this point, I was clutching T's hand in the back seat and doing my best to remember the instructions, while trying not to giggle. I have to say, though, best darned instructions ever.

We got back to the airport and I, giddy from the drive and the coffee at the restaurant, was given a once over my the securing guards. My belt buckle had set off the metal detector and the security in St. John's is nothing if not thorough. As the security guard was putting his hand around my ankle (thank you so much, cheapy zippers in my boots) I made the mistake of saying,

"Geez, I was just telling someone that I never get felt up at the airport. It's always my manager, she has a metal rod in her ankle."

I clapped my hand over my mouth when I said it, but it was too late. I'm a dork. I saw T look at me with a horrified expression on her face and then scurry out the door. The security guard who was working the X-ray machine laughed. And I'm sure they all heard me laughing as I walked away. I am such a moron. I still can't believe I wasn't put in some back room and forced to listen to a lecture on how airline security isn't a joke.


The good news is, I made it through with this...



A little while later, we were told to board our flight to GANDER. T and I walked out on the tarmac and saw a large airplane that we thought was ours. Then we saw that our fellow passengers were heading toward a very small plane with the name "Air Labrador" stencilled on the side.

This is what the plane looked like on the inside. The two gentlemen at the front are, on the left, an American tourist from the South and C, a friend of the person we were going to visit on business, who said the cabby gave us good directions.




And that's the Co-Pilot's sleeve in the photo. The co-pilot did the whole, "Welcome aboard flight 107 to Gander" complete with a Newfie accent. I half expected him to say, "Oh behalf of Jimmy and myself" instead of "On behalf of the captain and myself", but he didn't. I laughed the entire way to Gander.

If you want to see what the plane looked like Click Here and then choose the Beech 1900. Scroll down the page for a view of the passenger area.


Ok, next post, "There's a moose in my lane."

6 comments:

  1. Best transcription of an accent ever! I'm laughing out loud.

    Oh, and I too drove behind a gigantic pumpkin last week! It was actually a little bit obscene, and I had to look away...

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  2. Stephanie, my trout, very funny post, there. I LOVED your description of the cappy, very authentic (...my ducky...).

    Oh, heads up on the Martha - I think her appearance was cancelled since she couldn't enter the country due to the felony and all...

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  3. Hahahah, rofl about all of it....including that comment by Moe. "Due to the felony and all".....

    What makes me think she hasn't yet grasped the enormity of her "situation" yet?

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  4. oops....a few too many "yets" in dat comment, ducky.

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  5. oops, I meant "cabbie" NOT "cappy" - what the hell is a cappy? Now people from "away" are going to think that it is our euphemism for cab drivers. Gah. READ the preview, Moe, before posting...

    my verification word is "ilderia", find they are getting longer and more complicated lately. I have actually failed a few. Oops, I just failed this one, now I have to type "ttyrmawz", much easier.

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  6. Har! Loved the pumpkin shot. I'll have to visit Newfoundland some day just to hear that accent.

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