Saturday, February 25, 2006

Sure Signs You're a Knitaholic

This inspiration for this post was provided by my Uncle K. I need to tell you a little bit about him so you can understand where this is coming from. My Uncle K is my mom's little brother. He and my Aunt K have been dubbed as "the coolest parents" by their own children. As many parents of young adults will know, this is no mean feat.

Uncle K has a very intense job. It involves counselling people with addictions. He is a no-nonsense kinda guy when it comes to the serious stuff so I can't imagine him taking any "guff" off anyone. I'm sure he's very good at his job and I'm also sure he's seen a lot of sad stories over the course of his career. Even so, he has a great sense of humour and when he laughs, you know he means it.

When Uncle K left a comment on my blog last November, I called him up and said, "I hope you don't mind if I turn your comment into a blog entry." He laughed and said, "Sure, go ahead."

See, Uncle K has starting to worry about my knitting. As he has training in recognizing and treating addictions, he recognized my problem almost immediately and sent me the following list as a way of helping me recognize my problem. I thought that I should blog his comment as a public service (a PSA, if you will). I've added some photos to illustrate his points.


Sure Signs You Are Becoming A Knit-aholic


1. I knit alone.

2. I've changed friends to associate with more "serious knitters".

3. I have a knit first thing in the morning.

addicted breakfast



4. My dress has changed to reflect my knitting addiction.

Addicted clothes



5. My family complains about my knitting.

6. I've spent more money than I intend on knitting paraphenalia.

yarnsale1



7. My knitting affects my work. I knit secretly in the can at the office.

addicted can


(Pasty white legs, courtesy Canadian Winter. Photo by Jen)

8. I experience the following: knitting withdrawal; tremors in the presence of yarn; knitting dreams; I fall asleep knitting. I experience memory loss about the countless knitting projects. I daydream about yarn.

Addicted thinking



9. Some people call me "A NEEDLE FREAK". I spend more money on needles than food.

Addicted food



10. I tell myself that "I will quit tomorrow"

Please, my knitting friends, if you recognize yourself in any of these points, get yourself to the nearest... oh, never mind. Just buy some yarn. It's the safest thing you can do with needles.


Thank you, Uncle K. I'm glad to know that someone out there is looking out for me.

17 comments:

  1. BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Pure genius!!

    I went through the whole thing: check, check, check....

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  2. heh heh. i can safely say I am NOT addicted to knitting however i may have to borrow minou's blog to show my addiction to shoes

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  3. Oh hell, yes. If you decide to start a support group, sign me up.

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  4. I really have to get myself some of that trekking xxl stuff or whatever it's called. Since you have a decent yarn store and I do not, I may have to take you up on the offer to shop on my behalf.

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  5. It's clear that the difference between "hobby" and "addiction" is just the social acceptance of the former!

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  6. Haha. What a funny post. I especially loved the picture of you knitting in the can. It's not an addiction because I can give it up tomorrow. I just don't want to!!

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  7. It's a good think Uncle K is looking out for you. Very funny. And poignant. The only sign I see of real trouble, though, is the knitting in the loo.

    Amanadamonkey can tell you a horror story about the time she dropped a handknit mitten in the privvie at a campsite...

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  8. I can say based on your list I am NOT addicted to knitting. Now as for reading I see serious signs of an addiction. I may need help; I feel the need to go to the bookstore and do a bit of research on the subject.

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  9. Well, geeze. Knitting on the sly in the bathroom makes total sense.

    Hmmm.

    ...

    Perhaps I should look into rehab.

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  10. Great post! Only 5 of the signs apply to me... I'd better buy more yarn. :)

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  11. It's all true of me, except the last sign. I never say I'm gonna quit. He, he!

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  12. Uncle K12:22 AM

    Well Steph, I am glad to see that most of your friends are confirmed and committed knitting addicts. The allure of altered states runs deep. Your SnB group looks to be well in hand for some time to come.

    It appears that there are still a couple who are yet living in denial. Keep sending them yarn and needles. They will eventiually fall to the intoxication of yarn dye and needle clicking.

    There is one with whom deserves some concern. Her comment was to have you go shopping for more yarn completely ignoring the point of the post. Hummm?? She is either in a catatonic state of inebriation or has OCD. In the first case she would need immediate Detox services or in the second case she would need a different support group.

    However what the #%*^ do I know. My last word of encouragement is "knit haaaaard or go home!!! "

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  13. I swear I am not in denial. I haven't picked up a single pair of knitting needles in well over 24 hours - maybe more like 48 hours. But shoes.... man oh man. I was prancing around in a pair of 3" heels while I was doing laundry this morning.... Pj's (consisting of old sweat pants and a tank top) and leopard print heels with bedhead. I am a sexy thing....

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  14. I can quit any time, really. If I wanted to, really.

    I want to be in the support group too.

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  15. STEPH!!! I can't find you. Your email isn't working. You aren't online. You aren't posting comments on Minou's Blog. WHERE ARE YOU!!!!!!!!!

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  16. What are you doing Friday afternoon?

    Email me, bebe!

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  17. your uncle ROCKS!! his comment was pretty darn funny too :D

    no denial here...i'm an addict, and pretty darn proud of it too! ;)

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