Friday, May 05, 2006

"Take Your Knitted Monster To Work Day"

It was a busy day at the office today. We're getting ready to go to New Brunswick on Monday for a training session. I had lots to do and lots on my mind, so you can imagine that this wasn't the best day for visitors.

I was sitting at my desk when I heard a knock on the door.

"Come in!" I said, silently hoping it wasn't another crisis. Imagine my surprise when I saw this little green head poking around the door.

Henry Comes To Visit at the office

"Henry! Oh my gosh. I forgot didn't I? It's "Take Your Knitted Monster To Work Day" isn't it?"

Henry nodded, and looked a little downtrodden.

"Well, you're here now. How did you get here? Did you take the bus? Did you remember to get a transfer? Did you have to wait long at the terminal?"

Henry explained his journey, muttered something about how it would have been nice if I hadn't left him home in the first place and then hopped up in one of my meeting chairs.

"Ok, well, you're here now. I know you want to hear about what it is that I do here at the office, so here's a notebook and my favourite pen." I said as I handed him the pen.

A meeting with Henry

I spent about 15 minutes talking about my job, what I do and what parts of my job I like the best. I noticed that Henry had been making some notes. I pretended to get up for a book and looked over his shoulder.

Henry's notes

Somehow, I don't think he was paying attention. I told him that he could sit in my chair while I went to the photocopier room to pick up some presentations I needed for next week.

I was only gone a minute and when I came back, this is what he was doing:

Henry spins the office chair

Spinning in my chair. If he wasn't already green, I'd swear he was nauseous as he was going so fast. I sent him to the kitchen to get a glass of water. A half hour went by and I hadn't seen him. I found him leaning on the water cooler and chatting with Sue from accounting. Yeesh. I gave him a look and hauled him back to my office.

"Henry! You can't be distracting the other employees! I know it's important that you learn more about what it's like to have a job, but inviting Sue for a weekend at your cottage on the South Shore is not only unrelated to work, it's inappropriate! You can't date my co-workers!"

I excused myself again, as someone came to the door and asked me to help them with a computer issue. I swear, I was only gone for five minutes. By the time I got back, he was emailing Brilliant Disguise.

Henry tries online dating

I don't know if he thought he was online dating or ordering a mail-order bride. Whatever he was doing, I put a stop to it pretty quick.

At that point, my nerves were pretty frazzled. I gave him a few items from our "swag" box (company mascot tattoos, a pen, and a fleece vest that won't fit him in a million years) and sent him out to the bus stop. I told him I'd see him at home.

Then, I sat down with a sigh.

That's when I discovered that the little bastard had fiddled with my chair settings. I'll never get it the way I like it again!

And now? Now I can't find my pen.


  1. Henry had quite the busy day! Who knew monsters could be office assistants?

  2. (laughing...)

    Perhaps Henry and Delores (of Panopticon fame) should get an apartment together.

  3. Can Henry come in on the weekend? We could really use some help. Distracting co workers might not be bad cause then they would leave us alone. And we have no spinny chairs. Can he sew?

  4. Henry has remarkable penmanship for a dude with no fingers.

  5. If he could work on that listening thing, I could use him for the next couple of weeks to take dictation.

    I pay in Kool-aid and Lucky Charms

  6. Awesome, I love that little guy.

    You, seriously, wouldn' work be a better place if we replaced all the annoying people with really cute knit monsters?

  7. Bravo! Henry's a lucky little dude that you let him come in - did you ever get your pen back?